Payton Klaer

“Do you believe in soulmates?”

“…no”

“Why not?”

“I don’t think there’s anything out there that decides who we love. Let alone one perfect person out of eight billion who’s perfect for you – did you know that? Earth is at eight billion people. Anyway, I think it’s selfish.”

“So, you don’t think we were destined to get together?”

“God, no.”

“…do you think if things had gone differently we still would have gotten together?”

“What do you mean?”

“Like, if the world wasn’t what it is. The apocalypse and everything going to shit. Would we have gotten together?”

“No, I don’t think so.”

“…”

“I think I would have gone on ignoring how in love with you I was. I am. However you want to phrase it. I think you wouldn’t have ever thought about me in that way and we’d eventually grow apart because I wouldn’t be able to stand a life where I couldn’t be with you. But I wouldn’t force it. I’d ultimately want you to be happy over my own feelings.”

“…”

“Sorry.”

“What if I had gotten these feelings? What if I did love you back?”

“I don’t think you would have. I think we only got here because of everything that’s happened.”

“What do you mean?”

“Me getting sick. You blaming yourself. Being forced into a new world. I think it’s all trauma bonding.”

“…what do you think will happen if the world goes back to normal?”

“I don’t think we can ever go back-“

“Not at all?”

“Not really. Too much has changed too quickly. I mean, we could always get a cure but… I don’t know.”

“…”

“I don’t want to think about an after. I just want what we have now.”